You know your a mom when...

So for part of date night tonight (once James was asleep), Matt and I watched a movie. I love movie nights with Matt because 4 times out of 5 he lets me choose a chick flick.... and I am a HUGE chick flick gal (in college my roomies teased me for watching Flicka 3 times in a row when it first came out because I loved it so much). I love predictable, feel good movies all about love. So tonight, when I picked, "Life as We Know It", I was looking forward to that 'feel good' feeling. If I would have seen this movie two years ago I would have loved it- it wasn't too predictable, it had a lovable main girl, and two great guys. For those that don't know the movie is basically about two 'godparents' that become guardians of a one year old little girl after her parents die in a car accident. The movie focuses on the two adults and their relationship with one another, mixing in outside relationships along the way. They have to figure out what they expect from each other and basically the movie is all about them. Like I said, if I saw this movie two years ago, I would have loved it, but not tonight. I was happy with the ending, but I was bawling throughout the movie. ...I even thought to myself, "I am worse than my mom!" (-when it comes to being emotional for movies- she would cry at hallmark movies and we would tease her) The tears started following once the parents died and continued throughout the movie. It is mind boggling how much love you can have for your little child and how devastating the thought is of not being their for them as they grow up. Later in the movie I continued crying; not for the main character who was struggling on which guy she loved, but for this little girl who didn't have a strong father figure in her life to be a steady and constant figure in her life. Like I said, this movie had a good ending, but I gained a whole new appreciation for something that I am sure the movie makers didn't intend. I am so grateful for this little boy in my life and am honestly amazed at how I find myself on a daily basis saying, "Wow I love him SO much!". I am also so grateful for a husband who is my rock of strength and love, and I am even more grateful for the outstanding father he is to James. He drops everything to lay on his tummy with James and color, or goes outside anytime James wants to kick the soccer ball around, and James always knows he can go straight to dad when it wants to wrestle and be tickled. I am so grateful for these blessings in my life. Lately life has been handing our family some hard things to go through and its easy to forget about these humbling moments within my home. I have so much to be grateful for and wouldn't change our situation even ad mist these trials!